To Abort or Not to Abort, That is the Question?

One of the most politically divisive policies proposed by the Republican Party is the anti-abortion bill, not because reducing abortions is wrong but because of the methods they plan to use.  I have decided to place my experiences, thoughts, and reasoning here in hopes of improving the rhetoric of this very charged subject.

To begin with here are my experiences with the subject.  I know of a family touched by abortion.  One of the daughters was promiscuous and got herself pregnant wherein the father made her get an abortion to avoid embarrassing the family.  I did not learn about the situation until much later in my life so I do not know if the daughter and her sex partner would have been of the same mind; however, the point is moot since she had the abortion.  The mother was opposed to the abortion and was very hurt by the father’s decision.  I have personally seen the problems this family has had.

I also know of a family touched by incest and rape.  The mother had been raped by her father in her teens and was never quite the same.  Effects from that trauma shaped many problems within that family and really caused them to cease being a family.  The only good part was that there was no resulting child to further damage the mother.

Finally, I know of a single mother raising a daughter.  Luckily she was married or else some of your zealous religious leaders would have called her a slut or a whore for having a child out of wedlock.  The interesting fact in the story is that the child is not hers.  It is; however, her husbands by way of an affair.  When the mother chose not to keep the baby and the father couldn’t take care of it due to legal problems, she stepped in.

Why do I mention all of these stories, because they all have one theme in common, men behaving badly in sexual and pregnancy situations?  Why is this important, because all of your ideas for stopping abortions are focused solely on the women who cannot hide the results of their poor choice?  As I have heard many times, it takes two to tango.  So why is your sense of outrage aimed only at the women?  I bet any number of people who read this post can mention more stories like what I have listed.

I ask you to think about how we treat women and men differently in America.  When a woman becomes pregnant, a man was involved period, even if by artificial means but leave that aside for now.  When a woman is found to be pregnant out of wedlock she is called a slut or whore.  When a man gets a woman pregnant out of wedlock he is called a victim or naïve.  Daughters are kicked out of the house or shunned while sons are protected and sheltered.  Women will still carry the stigma if they choose to keep the child when the father doesn’t take up his responsibility.  Men will be considered heroes if they become single fathers, while the woman will carry the additional charge of abandonment.   If women abort the baby they are killers but if they keep the baby they are sinners for not being married.  With these kinds of choices available, is it really any wonder they make bad decisions.  Instead of forgiveness and support in time of need, they receive condemnation and punishment.  Most men get tolerance and protection.  They hide behind the fact that pregnancy leaves no mark on them.

Until men are held as accountable in the issue of unwanted pregnancies, there will be no end to abortions in this country.  Until the men that force women to get abortions are placed in jail as well as the women, there will be no end.   Until we change the dialogue that men are given to reflect the same standards we hold women to, abortions will continue.  Women are held to the standard that they must hold themselves pure until their wedding day, while men are encouraged to sow their wild oats.  Men are taught to have pride in sexual conquest, while women are heaped with shame.

Recently I have seen a self-righteous post from a man angry about the women’s march on Saturday 1/21/17.  In his post he said that if women want equality they should have to sign up for selective service, laws about violence toward women should be removed, and other things.  I pointed out that there are reasons for these laws and that men being selected for selective service was a male decision.   In addition, I pointed out that if he wants to see equality then men should suffer rape, pay discrimination, and the stigma of pregnancy.  I also mentioned that women are volunteering for military service.  His answer was that nobody said the world was perfect, in other words, the usual male response that as long as they are ok, nothing else matters.  The facts that women are preyed upon much more than men was meaningless to him.  He still felt his rights were being impinged upon.  Interesting how men have no trouble with controlling women but don’t dare let it be the other way around.

Until we change this male centered dialogue to a human centered one, abortion continues.  Until we hold men as equally accountable for pregnancies, sexual misconduct, and child support; abortion continues.  Until Hollywood stops placing unnecessary teenage sex scenes in movies to draw young men, abortions continue.  Until we stop selling everything through sexual marketing, mostly male oriented, abortions continue.  Change the environment and you will change the illness, only treating half the disease does not cure the patient.

When we stop placing men in power who cheat on their spouses repeatedly such as Bill Clinton, Newt Gingrich, and Donald Trump we will begin to address the problem of abortion.  Any man out of his teenage years that still gropes women is a thief and should be tried as such.  He steals a woman’s dignity that way.  Until then we are saying that faithfulness, women’s safety, and child welfare aren’t what we are really after.  Until we stop telling women to keep their babies while taking away any financial help the child would need to prosper, abortions continue.  All you are doing is placing women and children at more risk to satisfy your feelings of superiority.  You are showing that you are a zealot without compassion for realities other than the one you have.  Until you can project yourself into other people’s shoes to give better answers for their problems, abortions continue.  They will go underground like alcohol did during prohibition.  Men will use the extra power you give them over women to abuse them through forced pregnancies and the threat of exposure if they seek abortion.  Men don’t need any help with abuse if you look at the news and statistics.

Yes, I know there are good men and women out there, but this is what they should be demanding not unilateral punishment of the side that cannot hide or run away from the results of pregnancy.  Good men need to denounce bad men as vigorously as bad women.  They should quit giving them passes or praise for sexual misconduct.  Deadbeat fathers should be shunned from the church as unwed mothers are or better yet embrace them both to help change their actions through positive reinforcement.  It is long past time to change the dialogue from punishment to understanding and forgiveness, you know, Christian values.

To conclude, I would like to reiterate that it is not your goal I oppose but your methods of achieving that goal.  As I have said in a previous post, using bad methods to try to create good results in the short run almost always give rise to worse results in the long term.  The Means will eventually justify the Outcome more so than the other way around.  Until women are treated more humanely in this issue or men are treated more inhumanely for same, don’t talk to me about your Christian goal of stopping abortions.

 

P.S.  Oh, in case you think I am some saintly man talking down to you from on high, I have failed in this arena as well.  In high school I groped a girl.  I did it because of peer pressure, male upbringing, and damned hormones.  I regret it now but at that age it is hard to focus on right and wrong given all the influences out there.  Luckily, she did not hold it against me and we remained friends.  In addition, I had an affair with a married woman.  I deeply regret letting myself go against my values for the sake of physical need and loneliness.  I was the person to end the relationship but I still bare the guilt of the scars her children will carry in later years.  So no, I am definitely not a saint.   I am human and God knows we fail.

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History Repeats Itself

Confusion in the government and divisiveness by the republicans will open the door as it did in 2000.

Gods of Technology

Thought of the day:

Technology will never solve man’s problems because it only amplifies man, all the good and all the bad.  If you can’t fix man, the technology will extend the reach of man’s foibles.

Here is my two pennies worth.

Well, things are as they are.  I don’t like it because for all the religious backing of our current government, most of the actions and goals given do not fit the christian ideals preached by Christ.  However, my thought is that protesting through violence isn’t the answer either.  You just end up making them feel more righteous about what they are doing.  Also, you draw out more violent reaction leading to further repression.

My answer, stop paying them.  What?  I don’t pay them.  Ah, yes you do.  Every time you go to the pump, every time you buy a gadget, every time you eat out, you feed the economy that feeds the 1% who feed and control this government.  All along, you have cried foul at the things they were doing then turned around and paid them money to continue doing it.  That is why I have said on many occasions we are all to blame for this.  Since no one is willing to do without stuff they really don’t need, the ugliness continues to go on.

Why should they change when your money keeps telling them you don’t really mind what they are doing?  That is how we lost jobs to Mexico and China.  It isn’t because those countries stole them, it is because we bought the cheap stuff they made even when we were told it fed the machine of the people leading it.  Our own petty greed for the next Iphone or digital camera gave CEO’s the incentive to continue outsourcing.  Steve Jobs was a bastard in real life, cheating our country out of millions of dollars, watch the stories about him.  Just because he made such a wonderful toy for you does not change the facts.  Hell, Thomas Edison was a thief stealing movies from the first French director and making millions.  As long as you fling wads of cash at them, they will keep getting stronger.

The only way to truly wake them up is to hit their pocket books.  Cut back, do less, pay off your credit cards and debt, and live within your means.  I know it sucks because I am already living it.  I have mentioned my situation before and I am doing without a lot to remedy it.  I would be so damned happy to be able to cut up the one credit card I have and pay with cash, because I am sick of how much power I am giving them with my interest payment.  If you want to see the 1% brought to their knees, drop out of the economy as much as you can.  If a half of the population in this country cut their spending in half the Government and Rich would be shitting bricks.  We need to make them understand that without us building or servicing their products and, also, buying them, they would be nothing.  We are the ants; they are the grasshoppers.

Will it hurt?  Hell yes, you can’t shake the economy we have without jobs being lost.  The 1%’s only response to a slowed economy is to fire people for which they praise themselves for making tough decisions (to me, keeping people and making it work is a harder choice, but hey).  The other choice you have is to keep telling them that you don’t mind getting less and less out of your paycheck by buying more of their product.  Your choice, risk losing your job or send yourself and your children to economic slavery to the 1%.  Their plans are moving us in that direction.

Do without.  Give to the poor.  Learn to play cards and fix up your house.  Re-find family time.  Stop giving the 1% the money and the power that goes with it.  Yeah it sucks to do without, just ask those who lived through the Great Depression and WWII.  Let’s try to be like the Greatest Generation instead of what I have come to see as, the Worst Generation, the Generation that could not live without even if it had meant bringing our sons and daughters home from the middle east wars earlier.

Question?

If you have a country that its citizens vote for the individual to be the most important factor above all else, supported by an economic philosophy of buyer beware (if they are too dumb to protect their own, too bad), then who takes care of the country and where is the United in the United States of America?  Just saying, bones.

 

P.S.  Also, where is the Christianity?

Mexico calls no Backsies

Our current presidential campaign is once again throwing muck around about hot button issues for many Americans.  One that almost always gets extra news cycle time is the loss of American jobs to countries like Mexico and China.  A few decades ago it was Japan.  The headlines always read “Mexicans” or “Chinese” are stealing American jobs through cheap labor and fewer regulations, or some such.

In my opinion, no Mexican or Chinese person has stolen one American job, not one.  Whoa you say.  What about this plant that closed down here and moved production to China, or Mexico, or some other country with low labor costs?  Nope.  The sad truth is that we gave all those jobs away.  Through greed, anger, ignorance, and choice, we sold away our country bit by bit.

Many politicians cry that our taxes are too high and we have too many regulations, which forced companies to seek foreign countries to remain profitable.  Baloney.  The truth is that our ancestors saw the wrongs done to our citizens by greedy business owners who treated their workers bad, polluted our environment, and harmed our children’s futures to make a profit.  They fought long and hard, some even sacrificed their lives so that we would have it better.  They fought to make sure our drinking water was safe from manufacturing waste.  Others fought to clean up the fumes from factories that were choking our neighborhoods.  I live near a city that was once a big steel producer where toxic air was a way of life.  Still more fought so you wouldn’t have to work more than 40 hours a week without getting better compensation.  You know, all that stuff you now take for granted like it was there all the time and think is an inalienable right that can’t be taken away even after Republicans dismantle the last union that fought for these rights.

We then turned around and let our government slowly wind the clock back on all these gains by voting in politicians who wrote laws and tax codes to support companies that sent jobs overseas where companies could circumvent the morally correct laws our ancestors fought and died for.  These politicians said we could have things cheaper by doing this and we ate it up.  The companies that tried to stay and compete within our country were fed to the wolves.  With our money we said to companies that, while we like all these great rules that make our lives better, if you can go to another country and treat them like you used to treat us, we won’t penalize you.  We won’t place tariffs to bring your unregulated retails into line with those of companies in our country that have to charge more because of regulations.  Every single time you upgrade your Iphone, you are feeding the system that takes away your job.  Whenever we don’t place tariffs on products from other countries that don’t have to follow our laws, we are giving away a job.

When we allow businesses that use cheap inhumane labor or environmentally destructive practices (to save money) to compete unhindered with companies that must follow moral policies, we are crippling the companies that follow the rules.  So is it really any surprise that they eventually raised a white flag and joined them?   Is it any surprise that they seek to hire illegal immigrants or build plants in China and Mexico?  The longer we let this happen, the more pressure was put on our government to reduce the laws protecting us.  In the end we began to insist our leaders take away the rights and wages our forefathers fought for.  Today, instead of bringing the rest of the world around to our point of view, we have allowed the world to bring America around to their point of view.  All so we could fill our homes with out dated cell phones and cheap lead painted toys that we have to rent storage to hold.  Think about what I am saying when you think of voting for Trump or grab that must have electronic gift for Christmas, which would actually sadden Christ anyhow.  Think about how much your spending casts your vote long before you even enter the ballot box.

Finally, one last thought to bed you down with.  What must these impoverished workers think of our country when they see that we are unwilling to put up with such treatment at home, but don’t bat an eye when our companies go abroad and treat them horribly to give us cheap stuff?  Makes you wonder at the hostility directed at America.

 

Freedom of Choice

I was talking with a colleague today and he brought up Trump.  I told him Trump was an idiot for which he said, well, there isn’t much choice because he didn’t like Clinton.  I reiterated that Trump was and idiot or, more accurately, a con man.  Surprisingly, there was not any of the usual bluster from him, even though they were Republican.  I found that interesting.

Many Republicans are not happy with the candidate put forth by their party but feel trapped into voting for Trump because Clinton is no more attractive to them.  What a sad state of affairs in our country when someone feels they are forced to vote for someone they clearly do not like.  However, that is not the case.  Just because you do not like any of the candidates the various parties have put forth does not mean you cannot voice your opinion through your vote.  You are allowed to write in the person you want to elect.  Let me say that again:

You are allowed to write in the person you want to elect.

Hell, if you want to, you can write in your own name but don’t expect a lot of matching votes.  Also, you may want to contain your choices to someone that campaigned this election, since they have shown they are willing to take the office.  Someone that did not campaign may turn the country down.  Other than that, feel free to express yourself.  You can even write in “none of the above”.

In my opinion, should the whole country manage to elect someone other than the two candidates chosen for us by the 1% that would send a clearer message to big money than putting a multiple-bankruptcy, wife cheating, service evading, bigot into office.  The one thing the 1% are afraid of more than unions is the 99% telling them no more.  Think about it.  Bones.