The Hypocritical Oath

I shall have two sets of rules, one for my friends and I, and one for those I hate.

I shall talk loudly and not allow my opponents to get a word in edgewise.

I will call you a name if you don’t do as I say and another name if you do as I say.

I will fail to see that I am doing the very thing that I am railing at you for doing.

I will call those that disagree with me liberals, socialist, and Nazis.

I shall shove religion down your throat while I use it as backing for my nonreligious actions.

I will blame the person currently in charge for everything they and their predecessors did.

I shall praise God’s words as I twist them to mean what I want them to.